To be honest, I do not think there is such a thing as unintentional or polite racism. I think people are just becoming better at being racist, better at catching themselves when they say something offensive. So good that they have a quick “no offence” like salt bae on hand, and suddenly everything is supposed to be all peachy again.
Zora Neale Hurston once said “If you are silent about your pain, they’ll kill you and say you enjoyed it.” So, this is not a time to be silent, it is a time to share stories and stand together as a community. After all, we are the only ones who will fully understand what it is really like to be black. The first time I realized I was black was a particular incident that happened with one of my “friends” when I was in first year. She sent me a text that read, and I am not joking, “I can say nigger now because I have a black friend.” I’m pretty sure in that very moment, I died a little inside. Not because this is pretty much the most offensive thing a human being can say to another human being but because I felt like I had to laugh it off and pretend like it was not a big deal. I had to act like there were no consequences for such a statement, and as it stands, there really isn’t.
I mean I was new in Canada at the time, and this was pretty much my first time being friends with a white person. I was unsure what the boundaries were and when it was appropriate to speak my mind. I think a part of me also assumed that we were both on a level playing field, I mean we did after all get accepted to the same prestigious university and the same program. However, if I’ve learned anything from the fact that Adele’s “25” won in every category it was nominated alongside Beyonce’s “Lemonade” at the Grammys, it is that racism does not exist because it is logical or sensible or justified, it exists because it is convenient. The Grammys made a bold statement on behalf of the world to black people, that they recognize our best but it just does not matter. We are constantly told that they will listen to what we say but never really try to hear us. They will let us vote but always elect the one that best suits them. They will let us speak but will also be quick to label us angry and bitter and savage afterwards.
Popular black activist and actor, Jesse Williams came out and said what everyone other black person thinks when he received the humanitarian award at the BET Awards last year. As a result, he received a lot of backlash and he was labelled “racist” and people started a petition online to get him fired. More recently, there were threats to boycott Netflix because of a new show called “Dear White People,” that aired on the platform. It just seems to me like, a lot of face value and hypocrisy. It is just like the child that cries when their friend wins the struggle for the toy, except the toy here is a voice and a platform and a little bit of recognition.
Not personal enough? Then I’ll tell you another little story. A couple of years ago, my older sister Maye and I took a stroll to Queen and Spadina to withdraw some money. Suddenly, we spotted a homeless white woman with a dog who was a bit rowdy. Let me point out here that neither of us is a fan of dogs, so naturally, we both got a little antsy. This woman noticed our demeanour and screamed at the top of her voice “This is not Africa, dogs don't bite!” So dumbfounded, my sister and I both, we stood there, stunned, numb, unable to react because it seemed like an outer-body experience. I mean this is clear indication of how little people who aren't black are required to think about the consequences of their actions.
J.K Rowling once said ‘the consequences of our actions are always so complicated, so diverse, that predicting the future is a very difficult business indeed.” I think that the first thing that comes to mind after reading such profound words is that we as black people, more than anyone else, know this all too well. In the sense that as black people, we have been taught to be guarded in our speech. We have been taught to think about what we want to say and all the different ways it can be construed and then think again, before we say it. We are never allowed to think out loud. Do not misunderstand me, I think we should definitely think about our words and our feelings but not in a bid to make other people feel comfortable with it. It is never the responsibility of one individual to modify their truth to serve another individual, especially not to a person who will not afford them the same “respect.” It is already difficult enough, trying to make sense of the world that we currently live in, to add figuring out what other people think and feel to the mix is a burden and unnecessary.
However, I do think it is important to pick your battles. I’m not backtracking or contradicting myself, what I am trying to say here is not that you should be quiet and passive but the last thing you want to do is feed into the stereotype of an angry black person that blames all their problems on racism. I mean you definitely don't want to bring your native dish to work for lunch because this discussion will not be about racism. It will be about how you as an individual, are making the work environment uncomfortable for other people.
Another thing I learned from the quote, is to read and stay woke and be present. I think this is the very essence of Black History month. It is, in my opinion, a chance to read and get as much information as possible, especially now that this information can be so easily accessed. I mean you cannot defend yourself in an argument if you do not know what you are saying, and you cannot be passionate about what you don't understand. Note that by educating yourself, I do not mean double-tapping pictures about Black history on Instagram, I mean actually doing some research of your own and forming your own opinions. While I was in Nigeria, I visited Badagry, which is known as the hub of slave trade in Nigeria. During my visit, I learned just how little black people were and are valued, which didn't surprise too much. I’ll tell you what did surprise me was the seed of deceit that was sown and how easily the slave masters were able to convince black people to see themselves the way they saw them and something about it felt familiar.
I came to realization that the world has always been good at pitting black people against each other because they realized probably earlier than we did, that this was the only way to win. There is always rhetoric around competition and dog fighting and the notion that there is only opportunity for one black person in a room full of white people. It happens all the way from the White House to the board room of a Fortune-500 company to the classrooms of prestigious universities. Black people seemed to be used for face value more than anything else, and this is not due to a lack of talent or expertise or experience.
We may not be chained anymore but we are very much still in slavery. Racism is intentional and strategic, because it constantly puts black people in situations where they are can be harassed, overlooked, provoked, outnumbered and/or outranked. This is why a fifteen-year old American boy can wear a hat that has the words “Make America Great Again” slapped across the front and be surprised when he is attacked and made to think about his actions. This is why a college student of a prestigious university in America can rape an unconscious black woman and get way with a slap on the wrist. This is why the unemployment rate of a black university graduate is twice as high as their non-black counterparts.
I do not feel the need to end my rant/story on a positive note because this story has not ended quite yet. I sincerely hope that it gets better, but I am also well prepared for the worst. This is not a sad story, and in fact if there is anything I want you to learn from my story, it is that despite all that I and many other Black people face in the world, I am and will always be a proud black woman.
